Booked for May

Well, after much thought, time, prayer, meditation, etc, I have officially decided to do 3 weeks of Lyme "repairing" in Kansas instead of 5 weeks of repairing in Idaho. The West Clinic has been awesome, and I appreciate everything they've done for me. Their staff is absolutely pristine, and to be honest, I will REALLY miss them. However, there is different technology at The Hansa Center in Kansas that I feel may better suit me. Especially when it comes to Dysautonomia. So, the trip has been booked (travel, hotels, treatment, etc). Pretty sure it's safe to say we are going to be in credit card debt for the rest of our lives with this treatment, but I have to do SOMETHING. Can we afford this treatment? No. However, we couldn't afford the $25,000+ we spent on my treatments last year, either. I just have to have faith. My health is worth the debt. It just is. If you don't have your health, you don't have anything. I feel such an unbearable amount of guilt from the fact that the majority of my poor husband's hard earned money goes toward this wild goose chase of health that we're on. It's difficult for so many to grasp the fact that insurance doesn't pay for these kinds of disorders. Sure, they pay for things that DON'T WORK, and do more harm than good, but will they pay for something that actually stands a chance at making a positive, maybe even permanent impact? NO! Probably because healthy people aren't PROFITABLE! So, credit card debt it is. Once I am better (whenever that will be), I vow to get a job and work my butt off paying off all this debt I've accrued. I also just vow to get better.

I will be away from home for 22 days. TWENTY TWO DAYS! How am I even supposed to function that long without my dogs? My bed? My house? Luckily, I'll be with family most of the time.

My condition has become much worse. SOMETHING has become worse this past month. I can't describe it and I HATE that I can't describe it. Like right now I am having some debilitating silent migraine I THINK that may have stemmed from silent reflux I THINK which is do to my dysfunctional autonomic system I THINK. The weather and my cycle is taking a massive toll on me again.

I don't even really know what to do with myself for the next seven weeks until I go to the Hansa Center except for take iron, magnesium, B12 shots, drink water, find a balance between couch potato and dragging myself up and down stairs and up and down the hall.....Oh, and drink Chaga tea. I've heard good things about it so I figure I'd try it.